Thursday morning Hubby and I left Arkansas and headed to my sister's house in KY. The nine-plus hours spent in the car were good to process our loss.
Had we the opportunity to do it over again, with the information we had, we would. Hubby and I tried to remember any major red flags we might have ignored along the way and couldn't think of any. Every adoption, just as any pregnancy, is a risk and this one appeared to be low risk.
Looking for the silver lining in the cloud of a failed adoption, here are some of the things for which we are thankful:
- Angela changed her mind before baby was born .
- I didn't hold the baby (some friends of ours had a baby for 9 days before the b.mom changed her mind).
-After interacting with Angela through this process, I have more compassion for those stuck in a cycle of poverty.
- Our attorney is refunding some money, though the contract doesn't require her. If you're wanting to do an adoption in Arkansas, Kaye McLeod is cream of the crop.
- Though not many b.moms come to Kaye without families, Kaye is willing to show our profile if/when one comes her way.
- We didn't have to pay the adoption agency in Arkansas
- Being in AR to process the disappointment without Mr. Intensity was a blessing. He knows we want to adopt, but we've intentionally kept him in the dark with details.
- Because Hubby was there to work, I was able to meet with friends during the day. The morning we left town, I met Holly Bertram for the first time (we've been lurking on each other's blog). She has a son who's about 6 months younger than Mr. Intensity and the boys are so-scary-similar. I felt an instant camaraderie in her kitchen...finally, a woman who understands me and my son's quirkiness.
- Driving back to KY on I-40, we stopped to see Marie in Nashville. She lived across the street from us for 5 years in Little Rock and is now 88 years young. Just last year she sold her car because she didn't want to have an accident. In the picture you'll see that I'm wearing an apron and holding a basket she made and gave to me. Seeing her again was definitely a highlight of my week.